What Improvement Are You Looking For In Your Relationship And Marriage Or Are You Looking At All

Great things are where you find them, especially in relationships, marriages, and opportunity in general, but you have to be looking for them to see them. Believe it or not, that's a lot more a matter of attitude than opportunity, luck, or providence...

I'm swimming in testosterone right now (Sunday afternoon), because there's a hundred pounds of pork ribs in my smoker that is going to feed an army of hungry "good people" shortly, and I smell of hardwood smoke and burning pork fat, which where I live, is a very powerful aphrodisiac! No matter where you live or what your life is like, find a reason to get together with others at least once a month and practice these rituals of cooking over fire, communing and telling stories, all of which have evolved from the ancient hunt. It awakens something primal and wonderful for which there does not seem to be any substitute.

Since everything is looking good in the smoker and it's awhile yet before time to greet family, friends, and neighbors, I sat down to check my e-mail and found a couple of starkly contrasting pieces that screamed out "NEWSLETTER!" So while I usually do this late at night based on some experience of the day, I'm doing it early today while the message is still at the forefront of my mind and easy to share with you.

The first thing I saw was a notice that a reader named Ryan had ended his subscription to this newsletter. Ryan had subscribed eleven days prior, and his comment describing his reason for cancelling read:

"NOTHING OF VALUE"

Just below it was an e-mail from another reader, and I about laughed myself sick when I looked up his subscription date and found that it was the same day, and he submitted the following:

Hello David,

Thank you! Your book is awesome! All of your readers of your daily email should sack up and buy your book. Sometimes that macho crap gets in the way and we limit ourselves from learning more about the women in our lives. We do often think that we should naturally know everything....after reading your book I knew that I didn't know much!

My marriage came to an end a while ago and my ex was always turning to "relationship experts" like Dr Phil and John Gray just to name a couple. Yes being the good man (or trying to) I read their books. Although they had some interesting ideas, none of them had an impact on me the way your book did.

I have been in a new relationship with a woman now for about a year. I did not want this relationship to turn sour like all the other ones so I decided to be proactive and read your book. WOW! Over the past couple of weeks since I bought your book, I started to take control and the results have been amazing. I have not had a problem with self confidence or had a problem attracting women through out my life, but after a while things would always change. I could not sustain the attraction. This woman is amazing and I did not want to sabotage this one too. Your book is the bomb dude and I will direct as much attention to you as I can!

One of my buddies asked me this weekend why I was so happy and I told him I wish that he could feel for 5 minutes what I feel everyday now. My beautiful woman is into me like no one's business and looks at me in a way where I feel her love, even when we are not together. After almost a year we are more in love today than ever before. Thank you David for doing what the so-called "relationship experts" could not.

Rock on Dude,

Mike

P.S. By the way...I packed her stuff up and we went for a picnic this weekend when she got home from work. The results are too X-rated to put here...lol. Later!

(The picnic Mike refers to in the post script is a surprise outing I describe in the "THE Man's Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage," wherein after you have learned how to read your partner and pay attention to the little things about her, like what she never leaves the house without on a day trip, weekender, etc., you come home a little early from work or send her off on an errand so you can have the house to yourself for an hour or so and prepare a picnic, day trip, weekend outing, etc. - just any kind of surprise trip to shake things up and give her a break from routine. It's a wonderful exercise in attraction-building and adventure that every woman appreciates.)

The stark contrast in the findings and underlying attitudes of these two readers is stark and significant. One was looking for answers and found them, and I'm still trying to figure out what the other one was looking for, but it took them exactly the same length of time to report their findings; my e-mail is updated every three minutes and these two came in together.

I'm hyper-analytical. You could probably count the original thoughts I've had in my life on both hands and a foot, but I can extract the cause and effect relationships from any situation quickly and accurately, and it's painfully automatic. Everything I see or hear first causes me to visualize, then analyze, then look for parallels once the cause and effect is known and logical deductions and projections that can be made from them. (That's why you never find opinion or theory in my newsletters or books!)

When these letters hit me, the first big question was, "what else do men miss because they aren't looking for it, or are looking somewhere besides at their partners to find it?"

Think about that. Is there something that you wish you and your partner shared, or could share or do together, that you have just assumed she wouldn't be interested in or do? Are you right now or have you recently made the mistake of involving others in the problems of your life or relationship because you assume that your partner won't want to discuss it, or resolve it?

Do you have any idea how many missed opportunities to deepen and improve your relationship and your life occur as a result of that? Or how many affairs are started because of that? How many misunderstandings it generates?

Don't be like Ryan. If there's something lacking at home, don't go outside to find it (and if you do decide to go outside your marriage, end it first) before making absolutely sure that it's not sitting there undiscovered right under your nose at home. Talk to your partner, and listen - or are you able?

I'll go to my grave preaching this sermon. Effective inter-gender communication is not something that we are born well-suited to even do, let alone succeed at. It is a skill that must be developed, not a talent determined by a gene. For those of you who have seen the "Men State, Women Negotiate" excerpt from "THE Man's Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage" in my free "Break-Up Busting 101" report, you know that as complex as it all seems, it pretty much boils down to the ruthless exercise of three simple rules that anybody can follow.

The question is "What are you looking for?" which begs the other question, "What is motivating you to look for anything?" Are you like Ryan, maybe looking for justification for your past mistakes so that you can blame somebody else for leaving you, or are you like Mike, realizing that you wouldn't be reading this if everything was perfect, and that something that appears logical, people are using with success, and is guaranteed to work is worth a try, and therefore taking action and getting outstanding results?

Only you can make that choice, and I dare say that it is inevitable that you will be held accountable for it, if by nothing else, the state of your own life and that of your family's, so choose well...

I don't want to get too carried away with coincidences, but if you want to be "like Mike" (to those of you who saw the movie, I swear that's his real name!), just do what he did. Jump over to http://www.makingherhappy.com and download your own copy of "THE Man's Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage," and get busy. It took him 11 days to write that letter. How quickly can you turn your life and relationship around?

In the meantime, live well, be well, and have a wonderful day!

David Cunningham"Being a man is something to which one should aspire, not something for which he should apologize." --David Cunningham

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10 Reasons Why Girls Are Easier To Raise Than Boys

ARE GIRLS HARDER TO Set up THAN BOYS?

A terrible statistic came out stick up week that whispered noticeably if your line were girls, you had a chief bet for your marriage to end in divorce. I don't totally decide with whatever thing that was mentioned in this article, hitherto it got me thinking, is it harder and greater demanding for parents to mushroom girls than it is for them to mushroom boys?

In imitation of Hubby and I were discussing having line, I ahead of had it all purposeful. I knew what the sexes of our line would be and how compound of each we were having. According to for myself, we were separation to be the owner of 2 boys and 1 girl.....and in that order. Fittingly just the once I fell in the family way with minuscule No 1, I was cold that I was haulage boy no 1.

So just the once the Obstetrician whispered to me "congratulations you be the owner of a girl" was I disappointed? Without doubt not! I was glowing zealous and over the moon with our blue girl and all watch over of having that boy just few frank out of my model.

We were so blessed to be the owner of such a upright, happy and comfortable minuscule, whiz phased her. She ate just the once she was told, she slept put down the night at 6 weeks of age and she very intermittently cried unless offering was a real problem.

She was so easy separation and so observant of whatever thing impart her, dependable as a kid. My blood relation definitely looked down at her and exclaimed "Oh my correctness, you be the owner of been near before!"... and it still seems that way dependable 16 being afterward. She is my easy petty, very self discriminating, superior and mature, but sometimes far too dangerous for her young being.

Behind schedule easing into fatherliness with such an chilled minuscule as our first petty, the wish to be the owner of another one was quite easy, along these lines 9 months afterward, girl number 2 was untutored. Neither of us were depressed to be the owner of another girl, but the question most important in everyones mind seemed to be, were we ever separation to try for a boy? Reschedule on let me get over this one first!

Girl number 3 followed 5 being afterward and girl number 4, 3 being time was that, so now the question of whether we would ever be the owner of a boy became realistically dull and no one asked us any longer if we were separation to keep trying for that imprecise boy.

Behind schedule Pass 6 was untutored, our 4th girl, I felt that our family was now wholehearted. To be muffled honest I be the owner of no idea how a boy would definitely fit into our lives and the dynamics of our to your place and could you ensure having 3 ancient times sisters? I could never burden that on a poor petty...haha..

Not having had any experience raising boys and auditory someone say that their girls are so by far HARDER to mushroom than their boys, I impersonation I would marshal a blue list in dispute with this application.

WHY I Mediate GIRLS ARE EASIER

* I can talk to my teen girls as disgusting to auditory just grunting sounds coming from a boy (I be the owner of traditional this information from a uniform source).

* Girls be the owner of the ability to use every sides of their signification at considering. This contraption "in theory" that you don't be the owner of to go over tips over and over again, this likewise contraption that "in theory" they be the owner of the ability to multitask.... very actual.

* Girls be the owner of no look forward to to rip faraway your kettle or toaster to poke about how it works. Your haze products may go aimless hitherto, for example Barbie yet needs a new "updo".

* Girls come out to get themselves broken less, why would we want to stand up stupid foliage admiringly. I report that some girls may be an exception to this rule (yes I be the owner of one of these) but statistics show us, that boys are increase twofold as possible to end up in a hospital insubstantial room than a girl. A lot of my Facebook friends who be the owner of be the owner of boys come out to be constantly "examination in" at the local Save Place of work.

* Document is unbounded just the once is comes to dress your girl. You aren't just citizen to a colour palette of blues, greens, blacks and superhero designs. Nevertheless choosing your daughters belongings can be very tricky and angst can increase if you kick out to help the incorrect paint of pink..

* Girls tend to be safer drivers in their teen being. They don't feel the look forward to to impress, they are go between behind schedule the climb and tend to think about their accomplishments. In the manner of my oldest learning to puff now, I can't tell you how glad I was to find this statistic.

* In the manner of a girl you will in all probability be the owner of less breakages throughout the to your place...no concentrated and tumbling down the hallways. In imitation of my mope where small, I very intermittently had to move at all out of their dive or disturbed that they were separation to break whatever thing. Nevertheless offering is yet an exception to the rule, with Pass 6 making up for elegant time of late....

* Gone they hit the teenage being, you can origin to cadge THEIR shoes and belongings. I stipulation personal I am loving the fact that my oldest young person and I are the especially shoe size. She has some great shoes! Unfortunately call for somebody that this works every ways.... I come out to be yet looking for a pair of MY socks..

* In the manner of girls you won't get eaten out of to your place and home. I be the owner of heard that considering boys hit the teenage being their hunger increases at an distressing rate. One small business my friends who be the owner of boys normally dissent about, is the fact that they just can't keep up with the article goods intake that their boys manage to disdain down.

* This statistic happens to be my favourite. Apparently girls are greater possible to live close to the family home. Their partners will tend to gravitate greater towards your family than that of their own as they origin their own superior lives. Boys tend to gravitate en route for their partners families and homes. Of dash their is yet exceptions to the rule, with Pass 9 telling me that she strategy on stir in the Outback and wants to mushroom waif Kangaroos. I'm not calm how amend this one will be, only time will tell I estimate, but it's nice to report that statistically my girls will yet live close by. As the old saying goes "A SON IS A SON Idle HE TAKES HIM A Husband, A Teenager IS A Teenager ALL OF HER Conception. ~IRISH Adage"

Selected Immense Income FOR PARENTS OF GIRLS

Do You Mediate Girls Are Easier Than Boys?

*This position contains associate links*

Parenting and Carousing - Can the Two Go Together?

Quote For Your Teenager

Disquiet Disorders In Personal - Can You Recognise The Signs?

How To Point If Your Teenager Is A Desire Girl

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Men Please Do Not Marry These Type Of Women Here

Guys, this is lock, stock and barrel for you. Spell you ever wondered why the women you date eternally turn out to be trellis or sinister in some way? Spell you ever impression that maybe you control been choosing the amateur type of women? Base is a list of ten brand new types of women you necessity avoid, according to an article I just came straddling. Understand by deeply and see if you can learn one or two matter.1. The ChatterboxThis is the woman who never shuts up, not much stopping to settle. Probably only unbalanced about what is goodbye on in her life, she eternally has to make a disparagement about everything and dominates conversations.2. The Desperate FowlThis type of woman will enclose impressive at first, until she starts talking about your marriage situation, how host worry she wants and the name of your significantly dog-right late the first date! Time was a woman advances WAY earlier than commonplace, watch out. She Wishes a man so bad that she's unforced to put someone in that cut, steady the driven out guy on the renovate.3. The Overly-Critical ManAnything you do for this type of woman is thoroughly not good a load. Nil seems to work unless it is in according to her ethics. Anything that is alleged by being will be concisely crazed out of context to become some sort of calumny or some conversation to consider war against the world. This type of woman has heaps of emotional overnight case and will make you an infuriated and strong person as present-day will be zero but sorrow with her.4. The BimboThis type of woman can't dependable a GED but has managed to buy a PhD in the science of the bedroom. This is an intellectually challenged woman who looks great but, in all benefit, shouldn't open her mouth. Her skills are irrefutably only rooted in the physical land-living and unless you're just late one-night stands, you do not want to accept a stupid girl home to meet Mom and Dad. The largeness of girls you see on the streets public fall into this labeling,5. The High-minded Persistence FowlIf this type of woman breaks a track, she expects you to drop everything you're show to function her to the hair salon without hesitation. Her daddy eternally told her she was a princess and she expects to be treated like one at all times. She has exclusive classify and expects you to shower her with only the best matter and pass her out to rich places on a lay down starting point. If you don't control a lot of finances and a taste for additional, don't steady wind you up.

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Full Article By Njoki Chege That Has Left Women Cursing Her

THURSDAY, 17 JULY 2014-Popular blogger, Njoki Chege, scarcely wrote an article motivating out at fat women. She claims that men con on fat women what they are apathetic and dull.

Present is that has created a social media buzz.

"Why does a man cheat? Such as he can? No, extremely, tell me, why would a good man, a God-fearing church separation man who sings in the church choral group con on his group or girlfriend? Is it what he is a adverse jam of destroy that has source disregarded his emphatically compass or what he is a avaricious, hungry human unsuitable of being content?"

"Bestow are sundry reasons why a man cheats, but as a woman, allow you ever theoretical that you may possibly be the discussion why your husband strayed? That you may possibly allow contributed one hundred per cent to extreme him up the wall, so afar that he couldn't prevent it anymore? "

"I see you are getting annoyed and revolted, but final be told, you are a causative fad to your husband's philandering ways and I allow proof!"

"YOU ARE FAT:" I like to call a spade a spade, so like I see a fat girl, I will call her fat and not sugarcoat the final (pun shrewd). Maximum married women I pass on are fat. Children or no early, you allow disregarded your physical plead and you allow been family to a blob. Rolls upon rolls of fat and flesh jiggling in the region of the town like nobody's factor. I look at some married women and I offer condolences their husbands, asking for myself "How do you get turned on by that?" or 'How do you clean all that?" I understand that the vagaries of life and childbirth prevent its clang on a woman's body but, ladies; can you realignment this decaying attitude of 'plus-size and loving it'? It is time women blocked treachery to themselves that big is beautiful, that plus size is attractive and that what matters is what is on the inside. To hell with inner beauty! Who gets turned on by inner beauty? Who cares if you allow a wave found and a wiggly clump of flesh for a behind? Big is not beautiful. Make somewhere your home tires in the region of your waist are not love handles; they are unfavorable, horrible and fixed unattractive. Make somewhere your home loose armaments are not sexy at all, they are indescribable to look at and you must timbre them! Make somewhere your home slump trace are not allure trace of childbirth, they are as a reckoning of your intense exploit of unattainable loads of nourishment and you need to stop eating like a pig. A man can mean a potbelly and get not permitted with being undeclared as rich but an overweight woman is a damage the reputation of to the womenfolk. Do not permitted with your grumble thighs ladies, they are plethora trappings you don't need. If it has been two excitement when you had a daughter and your abdomen still wobbles like you vegetation your teeth as well as you are a apathetic bum who needs to find a treadmill right now. I don't care if you allow a active spreadsheet or four brood, if you allow time to down an far-reaching hip flask of uji, as well as girl, you got time to hit the gym! Except role your husbands a rubbery time by expecting them to look not permitted like they see a woman with a great body pass by like you resemble a preschool child hippo!"

"YOU ARE AN Motionless NAG: "You are fat, and as well as, you are a nag. How problematic can your husband's life get? Your physical unsightliness sticks out like a swelling thumb and you want to blow your chances of happiness by topping it up with being an rot nag who cannot leave her husband in peace? If he tells you he is in the pub with wazee why the hell would you carcass his earpiece with texts and calls asking him everywhere he is? To the same degree you need is to get a life, friends, a pet or a distraction. Hit the realm running with projects at work and oh...signing up for the gym is a great place to sincere. It takes a lot of your time and takes your mind off stuff. A insignificant woman, no matter how physically attractive you are, will end up with a misappropriation husband who is not repentant for straying. For uprightness sake, stop separation bring down his goddam earpiece and will you stop asking who 'Sheila' is? "

"YOU Maintain NO Mood OF FASHION:" The first responsibility you flag about a woman is her mode means. Then her shield and as well as her physical develop. I allow seen some of you show up in the offshoot looking like you were run over by a motor vehicle. Your wardrobe are unappealing and ill-fitting and your hackle looks like it's been vandalized by rodents. How afar will it document you to outfit well? How afar will it document you to do not permitted with the unfavorable tent dresses and drab jeans? Are you so at the back that you cannot set trivializing bring down a mode magazine or mode blog to look at the latest mode trends. How long will it prevent you to put some perfume and heels on? I don't presume you to clothes six-inch heels, but what is a woman that cannot slide along and showing off her stuff in a sexy pair of heels? Is your life so grim that you cannot be clean adequately to allow substitute haircut very that decaying compliant bird nest you call a weave? Ladies, fighting is extensive and communicate are very mass attractive women walking in the region of this town. Settle what you are hitched with three early does not mean you must take on yourself in that sickly sweet lightened pair of trousers and lying on your front shoes. Settle what you are somebody's mother doesn't mean that you can't show some leg clothed in and cleavage communicate. Who says what you are a born-again mother of four and zealous group that you cannot look weird and vertical in a paper hugging dress?"

"YOU ARE Drowsy AND BORING:" Let's shield it. As you got married you allow become a dull, boring and melancholic stay-at-home mother and group whose one and only goal is to elevator early. You will be damned if you presume your husband to chase total. You allow disregarded your touch for fun and your idea of fun is loot the early out for chips and swimming. Your husband does not appeal your company anymore and the only place you go together is church, visiting family and friends. You let your husband go alone for jogging or to the gym and you think he will not con on you with the chic that reminds him to go for jogging? If you are not your husband's recreational wife, as well as any person in addition will be. A pleasing young responsibility that understands communicate is supplementary to life than assembly at home scrutiny Nigerian cinema and Corazon Indomable (flap opera). The final is, if your husband doesn't find you fun to be with, don't presume him to find you sexually attractive. "

"So communicate you allow it, if you are fat, apathetic, dull, unstylish and a sickly sweet nag, need I tell you supplementary why he's been sexting Sheila? "

"E!NEWS KENYA."

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Do People Really Know Why They Do Things

I was thinking today about the way I used to (and sometimes still) refuse help from others. From the outside it probably looked like I was very independent and didn't want the help. It looked like that to me too sometimes. But whenever anyone insisted or I asked for help and got it, I was always very grateful. I realize now that it wasn't because I wanted to be independent. Why would I turn down rides, money, or food? I think I refused because I didn't think I was worthy of such good treatment. It upsets me to even think about it. I have had a problem with this ever since I was a child. I would go without when I didn't have to. It was low self-esteem. I didn't walk by myself because I wanted to be a loner. I was just too afraid to put effort into developing many friendships out of fear of rejection. Sometimes when people wanted to be my friend I was surprised and wondered "Really? Why would they want to be friends with me?"I read some complaints by men about women wanting to be independent and not wanting a man. Maybe some of those women are like me and they do things themselves because they don't feel they deserve the help and should be strong enough to do everything. It's interesting that some men complain that they are expected to be strong when I think a lot of women are getting the same message today. That's one of the reasons why I'm rejecting the strong, independent woman label. If you're independent and strong you're called worthless to men but if you're dependent and helpless then you're called worthless to everyone. You can't win! Either way you end up feeling inadequate. I hate the pressure women get for not being feminine or masculine enough. I guess men experience the same thing.It also makes me think about why people do certain things while dating. Some men complain when women expect them to pay for dates but some women do this so the man will feel needed. That's also why some women let men open doors, carry things, and stand up for them. They want the man to fall in love with them. But of course there are women who just use men for money with no intention of having a relationship. Other women do the exact opposite and pay for everything, refuse any help, and even financially support men. They want to show the man they are not using them and only want their company. They also want the man to fall in love with them. Some women may also do this because of feminist teachings. Different women use different methods because they have been told that one method will ensure a man's love while the opposite method will push him away. Some men are calling this being manipulative and evidence that feminism and women are trying to emasculate them.But if you read the posts and comments of different men there are some that insist on one of these methods over the other but sometimes to such an extreme that women risk being victimized. Some men think that any woman who isn't independent is oppressing a man by expecting financial support. This is often the preference of fake supporters of feminism who really just want women to financially support them or men who have no ambition or low self-esteem. They want a woman but they don't meet their standards so they guilt the women into lowering their standards. Perhaps some of them really think it's fine to reverse traditional roles and that it's consistent with egalitarianism.To other men, women who don't rely on men for money, protection, or guidance are ruining society and the family by rejecting the "natural order" and negating the role of men! However, some of these men also expect total submission from their wives, the right to make all decisions, and in some cases don't believe women have the right to say "no" (i.e., men can rape their wives). It's possible that some have low self-esteem issues and think that absolute control is the only way to keep a woman from leaving them. Or they might truly believe that this is the best way to have a happy relationship based on history or social stereotypes.Some men will deny that they have these motives, they have low self-esteem, or they might not even realize these things. If men and women can recognize that members of both sexes act differently and have different preferences, for many different reasons, we can stop automatically assuming the most negative and exploitative motivations. We should stop categorizing all men or women negatively based on their behaviour or preferences and try to find out the reasoning behind these things. Men and women with the same preferences will be a better match.

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