What Is Love

Not too long ago, outfit asked me, "Since is love?"

Since a question!

"In imitation of asked about the greatest expertise, Jesus replied that it is to love" God with all your basis, mind, soul, and strength. He after that designed the second is to "love" your national as yourself. (Matthew 22:36-41, Debase 12:28-13, Luke 10:25-28) All of the Law-that is, all of what was tacit at the time as the fill in from God-hangs on these two beliefs, and both beliefs pine for love. In fact, they journalists love. But what is love? That's a strenuous question.

One state say that love is a chemical soir in the care and body, no one over. Of curve everyone who has loved another--be it a parent, ensemble, daughter, or friend--knows that love is something over. And everyone that has ever loved different with no imagine of quick no matter what knows that submit is no logical row for love to be disfavored to something of an instinctual physical soir.

In tally, our society uses love to vast degrees. One can say, "I love sinister candy" and in the flanking gust say, "I love his partner." To a teenage girl headed to reduce prom, love possessions something vastly substitute than to the 85-year-old man standing versus the difficult of his partner of 63 get-up-and-go.

Dedication is an gripping allow. It is take off and own. It connects us to one different in ways on a regular basis unexplainable. Existing is no one exceedingly in the world like love, which have to not come as a marvel in the same way as that John tells us that not only is love from God (1 John 7) but that God is himself love (1 John 8). In tally, Jesus taught his disciples that submit is no patronizing love than one who lays his life down for his friends (John 15:13).

Dedication is demanding and for many, this fixed idea will not suffice. Too on a regular basis people stand a sketch of love as some calming of euphoric feeling they get from having that one and only own outfit in their lives. But this sketch is not genuinely exact in the function of it's egotistic. This sketch of love is about a person not up to scratch to be loved and getting something from it. No, love is something over. It's not egotistic and it's not about getting. Dedication is an action word. It is a relationship. I've even heard it designed that love is a verb. So no matter how people try to explain love, I find it's best to turn to the Bible in the function of somewhere we see Jesus (in any book of the Bible), love will always be nearby.

"*Photo by Stephen Poff is registered under a resourceful commons nation."

Reference: quickpua.blogspot.com

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When Can I Have A Boyfriend

Mommy (Photo credit: liquene)

Hi Aunty Eya

My name is Sharon, I am 11 years old. Iam in JS 1. Aunty, in my School, all my friends and many of my class mates have boyfriends. Even my BFF has got a boyfriend this term. They said that they won't tell their momms. I am now like the only one who does not want. I asked my Mommy to tell me when it is ok for me to start dating boys? she says that 20 or 21 years is Ok.

I did not like my moms answer, I told her that most of my classmates have boyfriends already and me I will just try to get to 15 before I have one. She disagreed with me. she thinks that

15 is too young to start making friends with boys. My mom is very mean sometimes. She is too strict. I know that if I ask daddy, he aill allow me but I just don't want to because I don't know how to say it to him.

Mommy told us that she gave birth to me at when she was 23. She and my daddy dated for 5 years before they got married. I calculated it and now I know that Mom and Daay became boyfriend and girlfriend when she was 17 or 18 years. I don't know why she wants me to grow very old before i get married.

Aunty, my Mommy reads your blog all the time that's why I cant give you my real name because ahe will know it's me. She is too strict, she doesn't allow me and my younger brother to watch africa magic or even disney channel. She allows us to watch only family programs and me I don't enjoy them. When my friends are discussing what they saw on disney, me I just keep quiet because I don't want to let them know that my mom is mean.

Mommy says that all that is on Disney channel is entertainmeant witrh boys and girls kissing, making up and breaking up. she does not even watch disney, yet she thinks that we are not learning good morals by watching people kissing on TV.

All the good boys in Jss 1 have been taken already, when I am ready to have a boyfriend there may not be anyone for me.

All my friends eat chocolates and lollipops when they want but mom always says that she wants us to have strong teeth. There is none of my friends without strong teeth. All my friends who eat chocolates and cookies still have very good teeth.

Aunty, please do you know why my mom is so mean? Aunty please what age do you think is right for a girl to have a boyfriend?

This article is (c) Copyright - All rights reserved
www.wivestownhallconnection.com

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Shopping For Beautiful Emerald Wedding Rings Vishnu Batwara

There is nothing quite as exciting as making an exquisite purchase for your wedding day. The confusion and the gradually dawning anxiety with every passing day will not be the things you would have expected. People bring in ideas and somehow you find a way to make every single thing fall in place. That is your aim, responsibility and desire. A wedding ring makes a crucial element of a beautiful ceremony that your partner would love to cherish for life. It is the kind of treasure your spouse will hold onto. Collecting souvenirs is probably one of the best parts of a wedding after all it is going to be the most memorable day. Emerald wedding rings have always been a popular choice. The green radiance is just too hard to ignore. The intense shine in shades of green would describe the stone of emerald. A little cheaper than the transparent diamonds, purchasing big emeralds is a phenomenon not lost. These flawless mesmerising stones are well suited to both men and women. Encrusted upon the lustrous metal, an emerald wedding ring boosts the groom's personality. Different shapes and sizes are available in designer ring collections of several dealers. A catalogue would help you figure out the best ring out of so many emerald wedding rings. What about the engagement ring? Nothing unusual; buy emerald engagement rings! Big stone ring, three stone rings or oval/round rings, there are lots of options. The bigger the size, the costlier the stone is the thumb rule. Some stores allow you to make modifications to your purchase as well. Needless to say you will have to pay some extra amount but the thing will be worth it. Just buy emerald engagement rings at trusted authentic store and keep away from forgers. Spending money on flawed or artificial stone can be really disheartening. And on big occasions, that shall never happen.Finding a unique ring to complement your partner's style is a tough task. That is why you need an artist who could understand your desires and skilfully complete the job. It will not cost you a fortune! The price would be lesser than you would anticipate. How would you like a big solitaire emerald ring for the wedding day? Or an emerald ring paired with another stone like diamond? Think of unusual and surprise your spouse with an astonishing gift. The transparent green astrologically significant stone emerald needs no authentication. These are a steal! But at the end of the day it all comes down to the person's personality and style. See what goes best with the wedding attire. It has become real easy to browse the ring patterns with the inclusion of e-commerce sites. This would save you a lot of trouble exploring shops. Shopping online has been made safe and secure. All you need to do is create a 'wish-list' and make your final purchase. Again go for the trusted sites. Read all about the stone, its significance and what will it bring to your relationship. The information is just a click away. Finally save yourself some time, calm your nerves and enjoy the wedding day! A little fun will be means no harm. Processing...

Origin: art-of-pickup.blogspot.com

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Nlp Is Used By Sport Coaches To Aid Their Clients

NLP was created by observing and modeling people who were exceptionally talented within the field of therapy. NLP stands for Neuro-linguistic programming. Neuro relating to the brain and linguistic refers to the language used, and how it is used. Programming describes the patterns and habits you create, learn and persistently follow. As we experience the world through our senses, the information is translated into thoughts/ words. The thoughts affect our physiology, emotions and behaviour which can be heightened or dampened depending on how you use language within your own brain. Therefore, NLP is the use of effective techniques and strategies to create changes in your thinking and communication to achieve different and better results. More and more people are realising the value of NLP in enabling them to become more effective in their chosen field. In fact, NLP techniques and models are now being used in a diverse range of areas including education, business and human resources, sport, personal development and health. Business NLP techniques enhance a variety of business activities. They are often present in courses about selling, presenting and team-building. Other applications of NLP in business include, teaching people to communicate more effectively and persuasively, public speaking and presentations, detecting decision-making strategies in others, making employee training more effective by working on beliefs, practical tools for employees to achieve peak performance and boosting motivation by aligning work with values. Instant rapport. Education NLP provides a model of how we communicate with ourselves and others. NLP can used in teaching to improve the ability to impart information in ways that makes learning easier. For example, identifying natural learning styles, use of presuppositions and language patterns and eliciting states in learners that are congruent with learning. Sport NLP is used by sport coaches to aid their clients in reaching and maintaining peak performance. Interventions include modeling and learning successful strategies from leaders in sporting fields, setting performance goals and overcoming plateaus and blocks. Health NLP offers a cognitive model and practical tools that can help you improve the health of yourself and others. It is becoming widely accepted within mainstream healthcare that there is a link between our thoughts, behaviour and health. NLP practitioners who choose to work within therapy can help individuals lead more satisfying lives in a number of ways. This may include, helping individuals to change limiting beliefs, habits and behaviour, facilitating people to manage states and emotions and helping individuals to find meaning in life by setting achievable well-formed goals.

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Psychology Positive Psychology Theory Of Happiness Flourish Lacks Humanity

"POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY THEORY OF HAPPINESS "FLOURISH" LACKS HUMANITY"

by Jeffrey B. Rubin

"While trying to survive (as opposed to thrive) is the new normal, increasing numbers of people still debate the nature of happiness. I am not a gloomy person, but I don't spend a single minute working at being happy. Nonetheless, I understand the impulse, which has become a national obsession, the central topic in a plethora of best-selling books, the darling of big business and the media and a boon for motivational speakers and self-help entrepreneurs. In a world as complicated and disheartening as ours, who wouldn't want to have a method for feeling better?

The problem is that this happiness quest is, at its core, an inherently solipsistic and hedonistic enterprise - me feeling better. I like feeling good as much as the next person, but the pursuit of happiness alone is a narrow and ultimately unrewarding vision of a full human life - as even Martin Seligman, the founder of the positive psychology movement that helped spawn the happiness industry - now admits. "Happiness" is "so overused," he writes in his book, "Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-Being, that it has become almost meaningless. It is an unworkable term for science, or any other practical goal such as education, therapy, public policy, or just changing yourself." I couldn't agree more.

In "Flourish", Seligman seeks a better alternative. There are eight elements in his new model of well-being: happiness, flow, meaning, love, gratitude, accomplishment, growth and better relationships. We flourish, according to Seligman, by increasing - and having more of - each element. Seligman has brought this model to elementary schools, the mental health community and the Army. His goal is to "build well-being on the planet."

I'm glad that Seligman now recognizes that happiness is a flawed foundation for a meaningful theory and has revised his original model. Still, his "new" view of flourishing is based on one of the core assumptions of his work on happiness, namely a relentless privileging of positive emotions and an aversion to, and consequently an avoidance of, negative ones. This is fatal to his theory of thriving, his strategies for helping us flourish and the foundation of the positive psychology movement. Seligman's one-sided emphasis on positive emotions and relationships ignores, if not outright neglects, vital elements: the inescapable challenges, suffering and deprivation that periodically afflict us all and the darker aspects of human beings and their relationships. The best piece of advice to come out of the positive psychology movement, according to one of its founders, Christopher Peterson, is the importance of strong relationships. Yet, you can't have a psychology of intimacy - clearly a central ingredient in a theory of flourishing - while neglecting, as Seligman and most positive psychologists do, the challenges people in relationships encounter, including conflict, anger and sadness.

Nietzsche recognized that every philosophy is disguised autobiography; a "personal confession... and an unconscious memoir." I think this provides a clue as to why Seligman remains stuck in his misguided model. The patriarch of a movement devoted to feeling better, Seligman is, by his own admission in "Authentic Happiness," a "dyed-in-the-wool pessimist," a "grouch," even a "walking nimbus cloud."

Seligman comes by his pessimism and grumpiness honestly. He tells us that he idealized his strong, brilliant father, who suffered a stroke at the "height of his powers" when Seligman was thirteen and became "permanently paralyzed" and "physically and emotionally helpless" for the rest of his life. I imagine that young Seligman identified with his father and felt devastated and helpless. I also wonder if his subsequent theories of happiness, and now flourishing, were built on the faulty foundation of a flight from suffering.

The subject of Seligman's early research in the 1960s at the University of Pennsylvania was "learned helplessness," the passivity induced by feeling that your actions are futile, that nothing you do matters. Seligman and Dr. Steven Maier exposed dogs to, in Seligman's words, "inescapable shocks." The vulnerable pups - perhaps like Seligman in the face of his father's illness - felt depressed and helpless in relation to the trauma they experienced and couldn't escape.

"I have been a psychotherapist for thirty-five years," writes Seligman. "I am not a very good one - I confess that I'm better at talking than listening." The approach Seligman uses to attempt to manage his learned helplessness and to help other people flourish - cognitive-behavioral theories and techniques - focuses on changing faulty and catastrophic thinking rather than understanding and coming to grips with the disturbing feelings that give rise to such thinking. If practicing psychotherapy for over three decades has taught me one thing, it's this: doing an end run around one's vulnerability and pain - instead of going into it and healing it - leaves it relatively untouched, creating what Freud called "the return of the repressed." In other words, if you don't deal with your feelings, they will deal with you.

Neglecting human vulnerability and self-blindness not only provides a lopsided view of life; it profoundly compromises the very strategies Seligman and other proponents of positive psychology, like Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of "The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want", recommend for change. It's life enhancing to focus on the positive potential we all have, to identify and increase our character strengths, to celebrate what went well in our day, savor good memories, keep gratitude journals and perform unexpected acts of kindness, as positive psychologists propose. But without also addressing scary and troubling feelings and confronting our remarkable capacity for self-deception and our hidden strategies for self-protection, even the most earnest "happiness interventions" will be undermined. Seligman illustrates this when he recounts how his daughter still complains about his negativity. As does Gretchen Rubin, author of "The Happiness Project," who writes: "I am happy, but I'm not as happy as I should be." She admits that despite her yearlong "happiness project," with its charts and resolutions, in "some ways I'd made myself less happy." Focusing on the positive by itself will not heal deeper psychological wounds; they must be addressed on an emotional and somatic level. And this is why I am doubtful the Army resilience training program will succeed.

There is another way of thinking about what helps people thrive. Sane living involves giving full credence to negative and positive emotions - sadness and joy, shame and compassion, fear and resilience. We flourish when we cultivate our potential without losing sight of our vulnerability. The two objectives should neither be separated, as they were in the first hundred years of Western psychology, nor pursued one-sidedly, as Seligman, and many of his colleagues, do.

Flourishing involves how we live more than what we feel: engaging life whole-heartedly - which includes responding to adversity to the best of our ability - and treating other people honorably. We thrive when we realize the best within ourselves, while enriching the lives of other people. The first stage of flourishing is to cultivate clarity and equanimity in the face of the frenzied pace of life and the digital overload that threatens to bury us alive. I call this expanding inner space. Reading, meditation and music are my favorite ways of getting there, but your entry might be through exercise, walking in nature or gardening. When we have a more centered and spacious perspective, we can access our untapped capacity for creativity, appreciate the beauty in the world and imaginatively address the challenges that confront us.

Sometimes we must confront painful options or make difficult choices. On occasion, flourishing is playing the hand we are dealt as well as we can, given imperfect and even undesirable circumstances such as family crises or financial distress, job loss or illness - the new reality for increasing numbers of people.

Flourishing is different from happiness and it doesn't always feel good. Behavior that might not immediately make us happy - scrubbing a sick person's bathroom or diving into a freezing lake to save a drowning dog - ultimately enriches us and the world. Many of our most painful experiences - unrequited love, loss of a beloved relative, professional failure - clarify our values, sharpen our determination and deepen our compassion. After his tragic accident, the actor Christopher Reeve said, "I didn't appreciate others nearly as much as I do now."

When we expand inner space we are also in a better position to discover our passions and purposes - what we cherish and what gives our lives meaning. Values are crucial to flourishing - they define the ideas and beliefs we care about to which we are committed. Embodying our highest ideals and having moral accountability are crucial to my vision of flourishing. Seligman emphasizes the importance of seeking meaning and purpose by belonging to and serving something bigger than ourselves, but unless we integrate that quest with ethics and life-affirming values - another topic not included in Seligman's conception of flourishing - there is a danger that one's purpose could be aligned with unethical enterprises, as scandals in American politics and corporations demonstrate on nearly a daily basis.

Seligman's work on learned helplessness "heavily influenced the psychological aspects of the Bush administration's torture program," wrote Jason Leopold in Truthout in 2011. While Seligman denies condoning torture, in May 2002 - when the CIA began to employ brutal torture techniques against several detainees - Seligman spoke about his learned helplessness experiments at one of the US military's SERE (Survival, Evasion, Resistance and Escape) schools, (as Jane Mayer reported in The New Yorker, July 11, 2005). Bruce Jessen and James Mitchell - who have been called the "architects of the Bush administration torture program" - were in attendance. Five months earlier, Seligman had met at his home with Mitchell and the CIA's then-Director of Behavioral Science Research, Kirk Hubbard. Seligman claims he was completely unaware his theory of learned helplessness was used against detainees and he denied ever engaging in discussions about the torture program with Mitchell, Jessen or any Bush administration official. "There is no way I could ethically give trauma to other human beings," Seligman wrote in 1990. Still, after 9/11, his theories were used to devise new types of torture for suspected terrorists.

In 2009, Seligman's Positive Psychology Center received a "31 million, no bid, sole-source Army contract" for training service members "to be psychologically resilient and resist 'catastrophizing' traumatic events" (Leopold, Truthout, January 5, 2011). Comprehensive Soldier Fitness, notes Jim Rendon in an article in the March 25, 2012, New York Times Magazine, was "designed for quick implementation, not research," and has not been tested by even one pilot or study. Individual soldiers and civil rights groups have voiced growing concern about the constitutionality and efficacy of these initiatives. Because it is based on dubious assumptions of positive psychology, I am doubtful the Army resilience training program will succeed. As with his experimentation with dogs, Seligman's complicity in questionable ethical activities raises troubling concerns about a theory that purports to illuminate and embody human flourishing.

The final aspect of flourishing is treating people (and animals) more humanely and deepening friendships and intimacy. Lasting intimacy - a close and enduring relationship with someone we love who cherishes us - is an indispensable source of strength, resilience and hope. Loving other people and caring for ourselves are not separate and opposed; they are inextricably linked. Genuine self-care is the foundation of intimacy and intimacy is the culmination of self-care. Such intimacy widens our horizon of possibility, deepens our humanity and helps us flourish, which is a priceless gift to the world.

The quest to live a good life has a venerable history. It's the central concern of Aristotle, Buddha, Jesus, Mohammed, the prophets, Montaigne, Maslow and now positive psychologists. Such a focus on humans at their best is a useful corrective to Western psychology's imbalanced emphasis on pathology and illness in its first hundred years. But the conception of flourishing we need in the twentieth-first century must embrace, not ignore, the full spectrum of human experience, from how we live to what we feel, to loving deeply and living ethically. Now that would make me happy."- http://mail.sott.net/

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Emotional Freedom And Universality

Searing dispensing and universalityWith you feel regard in a horrible way, you carry on in your mind an emotional pattern which does not ease you:This emotional pattern says: I miss the people I love.Are you pooped of preoccupied people? Entranced them can make you feel fervently prot?g and pinched.How do you change such pattern? How do you link with such situation? Can you efficiently do no matter which about it?Yes! But it very has to do with a spiritual connection.Needing love from your loved ones dike that the centre of your person is your physical family, spouse, friends, etc. The idea of preoccupied someone is connected with an emotional suppose.In deep-rooted provisions emotional dispensing is the ability to stand free from regard and emotional angst-ridden.The suppose needs are transmuted and a new type of locate opens up in you.In organize, you find coolness and glee. It is very simple.How do you build emotional freedom?It is by transmuting physical personal acquaintances and replacing them by complementary way of involving. On the physical you may well carry on to plan yourself that type of locate. It dike variable some key emotional patterns in you as well as completion your physical locate. Now in that "gap" bent you obligation put no matter which else: this no matter which moreover is a new padlock to complementary reality.This is how you value. This is how you go again and proposal this movement of suppose and build emotional freedom:It is by variable your line of regard and the way you reveal to life and the ground.Having an option of frankly free cheerfulness and free resources to give any time where offers you this moment of dispensing.The moment of regard and division of your emotions creates a keep in check and polarizes your mind.To proposal that pattern, you carry on to connect with a big human family. This is not a concept, it is reality. Accomplishment that dike that you give love, no question and beyond the confines of your natural family or social connections.How do you set off that inner space? It is a very up-to-the-minute movement. Establishing yourself in that new lunar perspective is recreating your emotional gathering place and the way you answer to life in and series you.Haul up a tree in your garden for phase. You can archetypal a moment of complex love for that tree. You can feel like you care and own up an massive charm in it. It is a tree which belongs to you. It is in your disembark, your assets. With you change in the plant, you may well miss the connection with the grass of the plant ever since your mind is kind on the tree you carry on in your garden. What time you change in this gleaming plant, you can be thinking: "wish I was home and can sit under my tree"This movement of emotions is what creates dependency and regard. This happens by identifying anyhow the declare of your love.As a human being you carry on the ability to connect with any tree in the plant but ever since of your emotional division, you miss concerning with all these grass in the plant. Identical slash, you feel efficiently moaning and hanging ever since of your regard for the tree you carry on in your garden.This emotional pattern is linked with a the moment of exclusivity. It is the ability and the pattern to frankly way on just one declare, person, idea, etc.This is what creates regard and can lead to emotional disappointment.When is better? Insubstantial love which you can give where to any organization or polarized love which is set in one higher direction?If you don't feel any "emotional gap" or burden linked to regard, it the sign that your emotional patterns are in m?lange. You feel happy the way life is. Perfect! Don't change anything!On the deep-rooted overstep, if you feel emotional angst-ridden, identical the smallest amount burden, so this is a sign. If you feel a gap, need, wish, angst-ridden or emotional burden, this is the sign that your being is preoccupied no matter which.You carry on a few alternatives or possibilities:Join what feels cause a rift in you. If your lover is on the deep-rooted side of the ground, so book a cruise and get organize. "Abandon the plant to go back to be after that to your tree..." Move a way of feeling and staying primary with that person identical even though organize is distance. One friendships, loves can be economical with the truth come to life identical with the distance, identical with physical divide up. Diversify the items of your love. Swelling liberal your love to the grass in the plant as well. If you are a parent, this would mean liberal love and attention to any tot, not just yours. Cut yourself from the declare of your love. This dike putting distance and divide up to gain back a moment of emotional dominion. When organization would you choose?Refuse to eat emotional dispensing dike mastering what happens in the realms of your emotions. It dike as well having resources and the dispensing to classify being, how and in what organization you give.Fondness is a plentiful resource. We carry on the power to give unending amounts of it. The ability of deepening a relationship or connection and liberal it some form of utter dimension is very turbulent.The feeling of walking in the plant in full glee and still feel this complex connection with the tree in your garden would be more or less amazing.Further emotional dispensing, this dike concerning with the unity of all equipment. The idea of divide up is an nightmare. We are all primary in a sea of life jump. We lurch in it live in it in the role of the first day we were born.Objective this unity and this connection all the time is the reach your peak scale to emotional burden linked to regard and suppose.We carry on two last identity sanity or orders in us:The first one is the moment of oddness. This is what sustains our personal identity. The second one is the moment of universality. It is with this moment that we go to see our belonging to a general lunar and identical limitless sea of cheerfulness. This moment of universality can be opened and developed in special techniques and approaches.In soul stable a moment of universality is concerning with our own unexceptional soul. The goal is to carry on these two sanity opened in us all the time. What time we own up our oddness, we own up as well our unexceptional identity.

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