Thursday, March 14, 2013

Are Men And Women Really All That Different

Are Men And Women Really All That Different
Men and women process information in entirely different ways. The reasons for this are probably part biological, and part sociological. Several years ago, a study showed that mothers of newborns spoke twice as many words in the course of a day to baby girls as to baby boys. This was regardless of educational or socio-economic levels. Developmental psychologists have long known that girls acquire language much earlier boys - speaking in sentences or even paragraphs when boys the same age are using single words and sounds (like "car zoom"). And sure enough, as adults, women on average, speak about twice as many words in the course of a day as do men. It's no wonder the biggest complaint I hear from wives about their husbands is, "He never talks to me." According to Rhode Island psychiatrist, Scott Haltzman, the average woman uses 7,000 words a day and five tones of speech, which the average man uses 2,000 words and three tones. Although I've seen similar quotes over the years with different figures, the ratio is always at least 2:1 for number of words per day for women vs. men. So imagine a couple who each leave the house in the morning, go to work, put in a full day, including a lot of talking with colleagues, clients, etc., and get home around the same time in the evening, having both spoken about the same number of words in the course of their day. He kicks back in the recliner, grabs the remote, and relaxes. He has nothing more to say - he's already used up all his words - but she's only half done! Another factor that contributes to these differences is in how men and women process information. A man will address a problem, concern, or decision first by thinking about it. After he's sorted and sifted through things in his mind, he may then, have something say. Women, on the other hand, usually process the same kinds of information by talking it out. So when a woman complains that her husband "never hears me," he may have heard her perfectly well, and is now thinking about it! Men, likewise, cannot fathom how women can possibly spend so much time talking to their girlfriends about seemingly nothing. The important point here is to understand these differences, so that you don't take them personally, and try to accommodate your partner's needs by meeting them half way. But don't ever expect that your husband or boyfriend will be able to converse with you like one of your girlfriends (that's just one reason why we need friends in our lives), and men, don't expect that your wives or girlfriends are going to stop trying to get you to talk more! Some things never change. Eve kept saying "Eat, eat" and Adam finally just shrugged and ate! Lee Bowers is a Licensed Psychologist and Director of Suburban Psychological Services, Inc. in Villanova. She has been in practice for over fifteen years. Her doctorate is in Health Psychology and she is a Diplomate of the American Board of Psychological Specialties, and board certified as a Medical Psychologist. Her original training was in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, Marriage and Family Therapy, and Ericsonian Hypnosis. In recent years, Lee has become more transpersonal and esoteric in her approach to psychotherapy, believing that for one to be whole, the body, mind, and spirit must be integrated. Deep (soul or Karmic) level meanings of client's problems can be explored if the client wishes, and together, client and therapist work towards a resolution that will be satisfactory to both the intellect and the spirit. To Learn More Visit: http://www.drleebowers.com/ View Article Source

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